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David Shaw, Penn State Head Coach? Not Happening

Jon Wilner of the San Jose Mercury News quickly debunks a silly rumor that's been making its way across the Internets. Namely, David Shaw won't be the man to fill Joe Paterno's shoes in Happy Valley.

There are a few reasons that Shaw might not accept the position. Well, ok, there are billions upon billions of reasons he wouldn't accept it. But in case you need some reminders, Wilner is happy to provide them for you after the jump.

Shaw isn’t going anywhere, and he’s especially not going to a program mired in the worst scandal in the history of college athletics.

He grew up in the Bay Area and his family’s still here. 

He went to Stanford, played for Stanford and was an assistant at Stanford.

Stanford is his dream job, and the only way he’s not coaching at Stanford next year — or in five years — or in 30 years — is if he’s forced out.

(He wants to be the Joe Paterno of Stanford, without the trouble.)

I guess he's staying where he is.